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New York Trip: Part One

This week's trip to New York was exactly what I needed: 3 days off from work, drinking, eating lots of stuff that's bad for you and shopping.

It all started on Wednesday, when we took the 7:50 am VRE train to Union Station, where we were very early for our 9:30am train to New York. Three hours and one uneventful train ride later we got to the city, and I successfully navigated the subway system to get to our hotel on 45th and 8th. After checking into the hotel (and Heather cracking up the hotel staff with her Debbie Downer observations--"6th floor? Great! The ladder will be able to reach us in case of a fire!") Heather and I took a walk around midtown to find some good New York pizza. On our way, we passed the theatre where they were loading in Martin Short's new show. As we got to Times Square, all of a sudden, there was Martin Short walking towards me. Five minutes into our trip and I had a celebrity sighting. Whoo! Heather and I were successful in our mission to find good pizza, then we took a walk up 5th Avenue, where we stepped into Saks. We walked around looking at the handbags, and saw some of the most God-awful pieces of crap!! One Fendi bag in particular looked like a 2 year old had put it together with some cloth and cat hair was "on sale" for $800. I should have taken a picture of that, but it probably would have been tacky. We also went to Tiffany's, which just reminded us that we need higher paying jobs (or rich husbands.) We got to Central Park, where we sat down to rest our feet and talk (as well as being the first location where Heather attempted to kill herself on this trip...) On the 14 block trek back to the hotel, we stopped and sat outside a hotel and people watched. There must be something in the water in New York, because it seemed that just about every other woman in Manhattan was pregnant! Seriously. Pregnant woman are taking over the city (Kathleen's friend Kate: "It's a plague o'babies!)

Before we got back to the hotel, we stopped to go into this bar that was advertising a day-long happy hour. Beer was $2 and Bacardi drinks were $4, which is about as reasonable as one can find in New York. We walked in and the place was empty (of course, it was 4:30pm on a Wednesday...) It was great, they had giant plasma screens above the bar and they had CNN on, and I was like, I should be watching that now at work, but I'm not, muahahahaha. We had a couple of drinks, and when the cute bartender found out it was my birthday, he gave me a free drink. It's been a very long time since I've been tipsy on a weekday afternoon. Oh! While we were at the bar, this guy who had tried to sell Heather and I his CD (he told us he was a DJ) in Times Square about 3 hours earlier, walked into the bar and asked to use the bathroom. The bartender told him the bathroom was for customers only, and the guy freaked out, and as he walked out he pointed to his arm and said, "I know what the problem is, my skin's to black for you! Fucking racists.." Yeah, it was kinda awkward after that.

Having achieved my goal of being drunk in New York, we went back to the hotel to shower and get ready to...go drink some more. For dinner, we went to Sardis, where I had a very strong cosmo and delicious steak. Heather and I discussed the lack of proper ettiqute nowadays, with the Midwestern tourists dressed in jeans and tshirts walking over to our table and staring at the caricatures above our heads...so rude! Afterwards, we went to the revolving lounge on the 48th floor of the Marriot Marquis, where they have an actual dress code. The only sucky part was the $7 cover charge for "non-guests", but that was made up for by the incredibly strong drinks and amazing view of Manhattan. This is where Heather again tried to hurt herself though, when from out of nowhere she dropped her water glass and it shattered all over the table. Thankfully, she wasn't too hurt, shards of glass in the hand and all.

We then went back to the hotel to change out of our very impractical shoes that were killing our feet, and then we went to a few random bars. We ended our night by going to the Irish pub that is in the hotel to celebrate with a drink in hand at midnight and the start of my 24th year of being alive. One guy found out it was my birthday, so he bought me a cranberry and vodka. While talking to him, the bartender brought us a couple of shots and told us it was from these guys at the other end of the bar. We kept talking to this other guy, when the bartender brought over a second round. After the guy we were talking to left, we went over to thank the guys for the shots, and they ended up buying another 3 or 4 rounds (who knew SoCo and raspberry went so well together?) These guys were...interesting. They were Noel and Tommy, and every time we would take a shot, Tommy would say, "here's to us getting cuter!" and I kept thinking to myself that that would not be happening. Oh, and I suck at taking shots now. I can't do it. Even the bartender was yelling at me. "Don't be a pussy!" Noel, on the other hand, kept telling me that since he quit smoking, his ass looked better. He would get up, start shouting, "look at my ass! look at my ass" and rub it along my leg, despite my efforts to get out of the way. It was at that point that Heather and I decided to call it a night, so we thanked the guys and went up to Kathleen and Kate's room to recount our adventures of getting drunk at other people's expense. It was a good night and a perfect way to start the trip.

Okay that took forever to write, so I'm taking a break. Part 2 coming soon.

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